(An Extremely Dramatized, barely Spell-Checked, Mind-Dump of Today's Events In Difficult to Understand Chapters)
Chapter Five: Winners and Losers
For those who know this taste and seek its sweet nectar regularly maybe this day's battle was trivial. Just one more in a win or lose shoot out. NBD. But I was the underdog. It was my first time in the games and I couldn't go out so cruelly.
I refreshed my browser and only needed to see the color of the bar across my screen to break into shivers. My hands trembled a little, I held them out to verify that they were in fact moving on their own. Then I read the message to myself.
“You’ve won this auction!”
The banner announced my victory with an exclamation mark, but it was completely unaware that only now that I had won could I see what I had lost in those final twenty-four seconds. It was all revealed to me.
It all made so much sense. It was never about getting out in front. The last minute didn’t even matter. All the damage had been done in the last twenty-four seconds. In the last seven seconds I understood why it made sense to auction items off in the first place instead of just setting a high price on them and letting them be, even if they're worth every penny of it. Winning an online auction comes down to timing, stealth and a fast WI-FI connection. That was what I hadn't understood before and that was why it only took an instance to undo my control and resolve. Boundary-setting got blown out of the water.
During those seconds, in which I did not breathe, I rallied back from my sneak attack, claimed my prize, became the victor and understood why some people just shouldn't roll the dice at all. Like Gollum, I claimed My Precious whilst falling in after her. I ended the day more than $120.00 beyond the level-headed price a mentally stable adult would be willing to part with in order to procure an auction item in question.
Epilogue: Know Your Foreign Exchange Rates
What is the moral of this tale, the lesson to be learnt? Well, firstly I never said there was one so you are quite presumptuous for expecting a decent wrap-up. But however, as both the victor and the victim of my own greed I can warn you: be wary of the White Hot Blindness in the last few seconds.
As someone who likes once in a while to practice self-control, I can tell you that it makes no sense to make a plan you know you’ll abandon at the first sign of trouble. If that’s your deal, keep walking.
Also, if you’re bidding on something in GBPs and you’re paying in USDs, do not attempt to do that math in your head as the clock winds down and you search for your home keys. Your calculations will be off.
Finally, from the nerd who will finally own all three records included in the Takk…’s Deluxe LP set in 6-10 business days, I guess, choose your battles wisely. Sometimes it's okay to step outside of yourself and do something crazy for something so random it makes no sense to anyone else but you.
Today was the best day of my life.